Saturday, November 12, 2005

Why Women are Exposing themselves (part 2)

In Part One, I offered two reasons for the increasing exposure of young women's bodies. One was the loss of female roles and identity, leading many young women to announce they are females in the only way left to them -- by showing their body. The other was the near-extinction of the concept of femininity, including the demise of feminine dress.

The ending of sex-based roles, probably the major goal of feminism, has brought some blessings, but it has also harmed countless lives. Roles, to use the most venerated word in feminism, empower both sexes.

As much as feminists may disdain the roles of mother or wife, those roles have bestowed power as well as meaning and satisfaction on the vast majority of women in history. When all is said and done, heading a home and being married to a good man are far more satisfying to most women than college teaching or corporate work. The ending of women's roles has left innumerable women more free to choose their life's course, but often less happy and, yes, less powerful. Roles empower (as well as constrain) people.

Women derive power from feminine roles, and men derive power from masculine roles. At the core of feminism is an envy of male roles and power and a belief that women should have the same. But, as a recent New York Times Magazine cover story noted, women graduates from Ivy League universities are increasingly leaving the corporate world to raise families. Having the same power as men did not fulfill these women.

Now, the third reason. With no feminine role to aspire to, many young women feel powerless. The one area of power left for them is sexual. The more a young woman has bought into feminist notions of equality (i.e., the sexes are essentially the same and there is no such thing as a woman's role), the more she is likely to flaunt her sexual power. It is the only power left to her. This helps explain why female students at Harvard -- among the highest achieving young women in the country -- have just launched a magazine featuring Harvard women posing nude.

A fourth reason may be surprising -- sexual harassment laws.

Women feel freer than ever to dress provocatively in part because men can say nothing about it. Omnipresent sexual harassment laws and "consciousness raising" seminars in businesses and schools have frightened men into not making any sexual comments to a woman.

As a result, the normal check on a woman flaunting her body is gone. A woman can reveal her breasts or cross her short-skirted legs near a man, but he is forbidden to say so much as, "You have great legs." In fact, he can be fired or sued for saying nothing and merely "staring."

One reason women dressed more modestly in the past was fear of men's verbal reactions. No more. There are vast checks on his sexuality, none on hers.

We should either drop all sexual harassment laws (except those prohibiting threats -- "Sleep with me or you're fired") or apply them equally to women. If men create a sexually charged work environment when they talk sex, women do the same when they show sex. "Hostile work environment" -- a trial lawyer enrichment program created by feminist anger at men -- should be either dropped as a legal concept or applied equally to women's dress.

A fifth reason is the most obvious -- a desire to attract men.

Every woman knows that the quickest way to attract a man is to have him notice her. So it makes sense to assume that the more of her body she shows, the more men will be attracted to her. The problem with this approach is that unless all she wants is sex that night, provocative outfits are not usually in her best interest. Why not?

This leads to the sixth and final reason: women's naivete. It is doubtful that women have ever been as naive about men as are large numbers of contemporary educated women. I believe that my grandmother who never went to school understood men better than the average female college graduate today.

So, as a service to any woman who is confused by the difference between "cute" and provocative as regards women's clothing, this may help. What you often call cute or attractive, men see only as a sexual come-on. If you wish to dress for sex, you should be entirely free to do so. But if you want love and attention, you have to know the difference between dressing for sex and dressing to be cute and attractive. The more skin men see, the more they think sex, not love. And that includes guys your age, your male teachers, your clergyman, your mailman, and the old man next door.


Anonymous said...

I agree with you, "We" didn't know that. It advertizes sex and does not give you the affection and love you desire, when you show revealing skin and most women aren't aware that men of all ages notice them all the same way, what ever it is that they advertize.

Anonymous said...

maybe you could post some examples of the difference? it sounds a little dumb, :P but still i need to be reeducated

Anonymous said...

I am a beautiful sexy 40 something stay at home mom to 4 boys and I LOVE my position as a woman - The other day I heard a comedian on TV speaking of the same issue stating something like ...guess what girls we noticed you in the 1980's when you wore those "praire skirts" and high buttoned collars, and how about that preppy look - you looked hot then too - we are men and we don't care what you have on...
So why these young ladies feel the need to bare it all for a man is not necessary - trust me they notice :)

Michelle said...

I would just like to say something in regards to modesty. I definately agree that we need to be modest as according to the Bible. But, all you girls out there are complaining about not being able to find anything to wear. I strongly disagree. You lack imagination and have no sense of style. You CAN WEAR the lates styles and still be modest. For instance, I went to American Eagle today and bought a sweater and a long tank top. Yes, I got them from American Eagle. I wear that tank top and many other different styles of long and short tank tops/ shirts under clothes that might be too revealing. If you buy hip hugger jeans, wear a long shirt that you can tuck or that is long enough to where you don't have to worry about it coming up your back. By the way, long shirts are back in style anyway.
Last but not least, while I applaud you for listening to the Holy Spirit and studying Scripture, I really feel that you guys make tooo big of a deal out of this and get too bent out of shape about modesty. I agree that it is an issue. But, the let's remember why we are on earth in the first place. It seems like all you focus on is homemaking/modesty/ et...... WAKE UP!!!! Jesus is coming back soon!!! How are you making a difference in the non 'believers lives? Some of you are so stuck in the 1800's. how could you possibly help a fellow non Christian. I think that if you spent more time focusing on bringing people to Jesus, et....., God will help you figure out the whole clothes thing.

Anonymous said...

I found this to be a very interesting and insightful article, but what I wanted to comment on was the painting of the five women walking along the seashore - it's so lovely! I really enjoy and appreciate all the beautiful, feminine paintings on this blog! Thank you!

Anonymous said...

I find it hard to believe that we are exposing ourselves because we feel safe. Fashion is bringing sexy back in, and you may scoff at the notion that these clothes are all back in the shops, but have you ever tried to find a nice t- shirt that doesn't have a plunging neckline? Maybe it is stubborn and selfish of me to refuse to compromise like Michelle does, but I would like to buy clothes for myself! Layering things just doesn't interest me, and I am sick of going out of my way just to find one item of clothing. Modest clothing is generally more expensive as well.

Anonymous said...

Modesty is important in dressing, but it is not the hallmark of my life. I wonder if the enemy uses issues like this to distract us from our REAL responsibilities. Like Michelle said Jesus will be back any day now. Are we going to tell him we spent all our efforts making sure we dressed mosdestly or reached out to the lost for his sake? Don't let the enemy make this molehill (modesty) a mountain in your life...people are dying without Christ every day!!

Anonymous said...

I think it's a little presumptuous to say the women here have no sense of style. Many of us do and that is the problem.

There are NOT a lot of nice fashionable things to wear that doesn't involve compromise of some sort. Or at least that is how some people make you feel.

I agree wearing a long tank or tunic over jeans is a way of making you look more modest. On that note, men are attracted to more than your butt and top showing. These clothes hide one thing then show off a whole set of other things. Some men or most men find just the shape of a woman's body distracting. Hip huggers are just that, hip huggers. They show off your hips and MOST men find that sexy!

Some people make you feel that your neck needs to be covered and your hair and it just gets to be ridiculous. Why not cover our faces too because I know many men who find eyes sexy as well as the curve of your lips or the dimple in your chin. The curve of the jaw line is sexy too!! Why not just go around wearing a paper sack:)
I think it's ridiculous at times because men do not take the same responsibility. I am distracted by a man with his shirt off and just about any church I have attended the guys have no problem taking off their shirts to play sports or to do a car wash to raise money for the church. Yeah they are more than likely just hot and not trying to make anyone stumble but I get quite distracted when a man with a nice chest and abs goes shirtless and the same thing with his butt. If the jeans are showing it then I am more than likely going to notice. And I'm so sick of men trying to say we are arroused by touch but they are by sight. Please men give me a break! God gave us eyes we are just a lot more quiet about it and some women down right lie because they don't want to appear as to have those types of problems. I'm not saying that all women lie. I know there are some women who honestly don't pay that much attention. I read that women are just as much visual as men and a lot of them have sub par hormone levels and that is why they do not notice. I read it derives from the female diet. And women are lacking a lot of things including larger omega 3 fatty acids that contributes to this low sex drive.

I'll tell you one thing. This is one chick that notices men and I know of more women that do notice then don't.

Take note men and take responsibility as well.

P.S. I think what we find sexy depends on our society. Some cultures go around naked and men I noticed could care less cause they are exposed to it constantly. I'm not suggesting streaking.

I read that God made Adam and Eve tunics and it was the same as a sleeveless tunic.

If I saw a man in a sleeveless tunic and he had pretty skin and a nice build I'm going to be distracted. Plain and simple. There will be times we dress modest but there will always be someone making us feel that it's not enough. If God made a sleeveless tunic for Adam and Eve then it's good enough for the rest of us.